When you have been deeply wronged, forgiveness may be the last thing on your mind. Nothing will convince you that the person that hurt you does not deserve all the anger and hostility you can muster. Try as you might though, your anger does not harm the other person. In most cases, it’s life as usual for the other person while you stew away in stress.
Perhaps now is the time to remember that forgiveness is a gift you give to yourself.
Holding a grudge is like punching yourself in the face and expecting the other person to say, “Ouch.”
Forgiveness is the healthy choice for several reasons:
1. Living in the past steals your present and taints your future. A great future requires an attentive present. That’s not possible if you’re living in the past. Life is happening right now at this very moment. Every “now” spent in “yesterday”, is lost forever. Reclaim your life by forgiving and moving on.
2. Failing to forgive creates misery. Creating and maintaining negative thoughts will slowly eat away at the core of who you are. Positive thoughts and beliefs support a positive state of being while refusing to forgive the person or people that have wronged you, forces you to create and perpetuate a negative mental cycle that will harm you in the end. Unforgiveness is self-harm.
3. Forgiveness makes you stronger. Forgiveness can be challenging! Staying angry is easier to a certain extent, but staying angry does not challenge your personal growth. Show yourself just how strong you are. Take a deep breath and start on the path of forgiveness. It becomes easier with time.
- As an added bonus, the more forgiving you are, the more others are willing to forgive you!
4. The past cannot be changed, but your attitude can. What is the purpose of your anger? If you stay angry for the next ten years, what have you accomplished? Nothing you do today can change what happened yesterday. A change in your attitude, however, can open doors of freedom and launch you into new paths that you didn’t know were possible.
5. They’ll be back sooner or later. You cannot avoid people forever. Whether you forgive them or not, they’re sure to pop back into your life in the future. In most cases, they’ll act as if nothing ever happened. However, your resentment will make you feel bad all over again if you’re still holding a grudge.
The sooner you forgive, the sooner you can straighten your crown and keep stepping.
6. All humans make mistakes. We’ve all done or said things we later regret. You can’t expect to be forgiven if you’re unwilling to forgive. Living a perfect life and making perfect choices isn’t possible. Mistakes happen and once you embrace this truth, forgiveness flows a little easier.
7. Forgiveness may be the best form of revenge. If someone upsets you, it’s quite possible that it was intentional. While you might feel the need to strike back, forgiveness is the best policy. Show them you’re enjoying bigger and better things. Living a happy life is the best revenge!
8. Your health will improve. Happiness and peacefulness undoubtedly support good health and longevity. Live a long and wonderful life. Be forgiving. The Mayo Clinic confirms that forgiveness is a marker that can lead to:
- Healthier relationships
- Lower blood pressure
- Stronger immune system
- Improved heart health
- Higher self-esteem
Forgiveness is self-serving. It’s something you do for yourself, because the alternative is harmful to your health, happiness, and future. Be good to yourself. The fact that you’re letting the other person off the hook is secondary. Forgiveness is necessary for your overall mental, spiritual and physical health.
Forgiveness requires real strength. The fastest way to heal any transgression against you is forgiveness. Remember that forgiveness doesn’t always mean that you give the other person a second chance. It just means that you’re not willing to suffer any longer.